How I’m Overcoming Fear and Imposter Syndrome as a Shamanic Healer

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Why am I scared to talk about my work as a Shamanic Healer???

This is a question I struggled with for quite a while, and it was a big reason I delayed starting my business. The truth is, I carried a deep, lingering fear of being the odd kid in town. It’s hard for me to pinpoint exactly when this need to fit in originated, because honestly, it feels like it’s always been there. I remember, even as a young child, cleaning my room without being asked just to gain the approval of the adults around me. In early grade school, I wanted so badly to join the other kids playing make-believe, but instead, I stayed on the swing with another girl because she thought pretending was “dumb,” and I didn’t want her to think the same of me.

For many years, this became my pattern: closing off my heart’s calling so I could blend in. But when we stifle our heart’s calling, we also suppress our inner light.

Where did our light go?

There’s a type of healing in Shamanic practice called Soul Retrieval. In both small moments and big traumatic ones, pieces of our light, our Spirit, can break away and stay safely hidden until we are ready to call them back home within us. This is called soul loss, and it happens when an experience feels too overwhelming to hold, so a part of us steps aside for safety.

A Soul Retrieval is the Shamanic technique used to call these pieces back, but this only happens when the receiver is truly ready. You wouldn’t call back a soul piece before it’s time, just like you wouldn’t plant a seed in soil that hasn’t been tended to first. The ground needs to be properly prepared, weeds removed, compost added, and the season must be right, or the seed won’t take root. In the same way, our Spirit needs care and support in order for that part of us to return and stay.

But who would go watch a movie or read a book with an uneventful plot? Every story needs a beginning, a middle, and an end, and every hero faces challenges that lead to growth. Your life is that story, and you are the hero of your own unique, sacred journey. The moments of soul loss you’ve experienced are part of your plot, written perfectly for your Spirit’s growth, and each step on your healing path helps you face these challenges and reclaim your inner light.

To me, living a life here on Earth is a funny thing. Many people in the spiritual community agree that we come here with a plan and a purpose, but we also agree to forget about that plan and purpose so that we can find our way back to it. I have a very clear memory from when I was in kindergarten, walking alone down the hall to the bathroom. I remember a moment while I was sitting on the toilet and suddenly thinking, What am I doing here? Not in the sense of what am I doing sitting on this toilet, but in my life. How did I get here, and what’s my purpose of being here? Needless to say, I did not get an answer at that moment. The time was not right, and I was not ready to fulfill my destiny at the ripe old age of five.

Stepping onto a Shamanic path was the part in my own story where I began to call back my light. It marked the start of a deep healing process, and little by little, I began to retrieve the parts of my soul that had flown away. All of those times I dimmed my light around others were the very pieces I started to reclaim. This did not happen for me until later in my life, in my late 30’s. There’s a part of me that wishes I could go back and shake my younger self and tell her “Get yourself together!” But in my heart, I know that the soil was not prepped and ready yet.

The Fear that Steers Us

This now brings me to the very title of this blog post: Why am I scared to talk about my work as a Shamanic Healer? It turns out, I am probably not alone in this. This is something that many other healers, spiritual entrepreneurs, and creatives experience, especially when in the realm of things that one can’t tangibly see or hold with their hands.

This fear is often called imposter syndrome. It is the voice inside your head telling you that you’re not good enough, not qualified enough, making you wonder who in the world would even seek out your services. This is a heavy burden to bear, and the fear causes us to close off our hearts. Fear is an emotion, and emotions are here for a reason. They always guide us to the places calling for our healing. We have two choices: do we stifle, ignore, or suppress them? Or do we embrace the fear and move forward on the path together?

As I began speaking up about this new path I was walking, all of this fear came knocking on my door to remind me that it was still there, waiting for me to face it. Me…I chose the avoidance option at first!

When people asked about my Shamanic healing, I could instantly feel my stomach clench, my heart rate increase, my breath grow shallow, and heat rise to my head. My first reaction was avoidance. I would breeze past the topic, change the conversation, or suddenly find something I just had to do right that second so I could retreat without fully feeling what was coming up. Classic avoidance.

Conversations would usually go a little something like this:

Other: “What kind of business are you starting?”

Me: “I’m a Shamanic Healer. I provide energy healing and intuitive guidance to help support people with their healing and spiritual growth.”

Other: “How do you do that?”

Me: “Well, I work with Spirit Guides from the non-physical realm and bridge through energetic healing.”

Other: “Interesting…”

In other words, invisible work with invisible helpers from non-physical reality. Sounds a little crazy, right?

Avoidance has its limits, and I eventually began to realize that this was certainly no way to live. I would never meet my goal of changing my career and life direction if I kept up with the same avoidance tactic. Fear was simply trying to get my attention, and I was ignoring it over and over again. When we don’t face our emotions, we dishonor them, and we miss the sacred guidance and message they offer. And how could I dishonor something I truly love and believe in by continuing to avoid it? The truth is, it wasn’t really about what I was doing. It was about me, and the internal fears I still hadn’t faced.

Selling the Invisible

Not long ago, I went to dinner with a friend who asked me to explain my work, what it is that I do, and how I knew I was meant to do this. We talked about my path, the intuitive nudges along the way, the healing I had done, and the ways I now support others through their own transformation.

At one point in the conversation, she remarked how it all seemed very abstract and so different from selling something physical, like an item you can hold in your hand or see with your eyes. What’s funny is, this was something I had often said to my husband. Life would be easier if I was just selling ice cream! You know what you’re buying, you can experience it in the moment, and most people are familiar with the product.

So why would my path lead me here, to a place where I’m offering something that can’t be packaged, displayed, or even easily explained? Something seemingly invisible at first glance?

Life is fleeting. And the deeper truth is that we take nothing with us when we pass on. None of our belongings, none of the plants or animals around us, not even the food. What remains and carries with us when we leave this Earth is our Spirit. So in reality, the service I offer is the most real and tangible of all. Our Spirit is eternal, so tending to our soul’s evolution and truly remembering our own light becomes the most sacred, long-lasting gift we can give ourselves. Every piece of our light we call back, every moment of soul retrieval, brings us closer to that remembrance.

The work I do might be invisible to the eye, but not to the Spirit. When a piece of our soul returns, it may not be something we can hold in our hands like ice cream, but we feel it deeply, and it changes us in ways that can be hard to describe with words. Over time, the effects of that inner change begin to show outwardly. Life starts to feel different, and we start to feel different as we move through our day to day. We begin to navigate life with more clarity, ease, and naturalness.

The work I do brings people back to themselves, to their own light, to the parts they thought were lost or broken or forgotten. And that is more real than anything I could ever sell on a shelf.

Walking With Fear on Our Hero’s Journey

I didn’t get over my fear of talking about my work overnight. In fact, there are still moments in conversation where I feel the fear rising again. I’m still playing out my own hero’s journey, and I imagine likewise you are too.

But we don’t get to fast-forward to the final chapter. Moving through fear is the sacred middle part of the story, where the burden can feel immense, and our healing and growth can be challenging and uncomfortable at times. Yet as we move forward, despite the fear, we begin to gain a clearer view of the land ahead. This is the next part of our journey, where we walk through life with greater ease and begin to serve others with our healing gifts. Change happens within us first, and from there it emanates outward through the gifts we offer in service to the world. This is also the true meaning of stepping into our purpose: reclaiming our light, finding our voice, and remembering our Spirit Within.

Remember, all great stories have a beginning, a middle, and an end. The story that is you is a truly unique and special one. Never before has there been someone exactly like you, and there never will be again. While we may have the same fear or the same struggle, how you move through them will guide others in ways only you can.

So let’s walk hand in hand with fear, not as a foe, but as a friend on the path to remembering our Spirit Within. May we all find the courage to share our light with the world.

 

Blessings on your journey,

P.S. If this post resonated with you, I’d love to stay in touch.

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The Wisdom of Fly Spirit

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Many times, I find myself as a “get stuff done” kind of person. My natural urge to get things done now, not later, combined with my years as a nurse, often causes me to slip into impatient habits.  I have found myself reflecting lately: How do we know when to flow with the universe and when to push through discomfort?  

Wisdom from Spirit often comes through in unexpected ways, and this was the case for me one Saturday morning. I was waiting in a parking lot for my son to finish a Boy Scout gathering.  It was a beautiful day, which was a nice treat after the cold winter. I decided to open the car windows to enjoy the fresh air.  As a breeze brushed against my face, a fly zoomed in and immediately went straight for the car’s windshield.  

The fly began buzzing frantically, clearly unable to understand why it couldn’t continue its initial flight path to the open air beyond.  It was as if an invisible block was preventing it from seeing what it was up against!  I tried to gently guide the fly towards the open window, but no matter which way I led it, it kept returning to the windshield. Several times it even flew right past the open window, not realizing that its freedom lay just beyond!  Eventually, the fly ended up in a crevice at the base of the windshield.  

It was at this point that I decided to stop trying.  I rolled up the windows and decided to sit back and take in the scenery for a bit.  Not long after, I heard the buzzing again.  The fly had found its way out of hiding and landed on the window next to me.  Carefully, I lowered the window and out it flew, just as easily as it had arrived!

Sometimes we get caught in moments of stress, and just as I did with the fly, we throw this and that at it, hoping for a quick fix solution.  It’s often our natural instinct to try and make things right and restore balance in our lives.  This reactive response can be amplified by a history of trauma, leaving us reacting from a state of fight, flight, or freeze.  But when we are in this stress response, like the fly staring through the windshield and not realizing it’s actually inside a car and not outdoors anymore, we can fixate too closely on our external problems and forget the bigger picture.  

There are certainly times when we clearly do want to push forward despite seeming obstacles.  For example, have you ever had a work or school deadline looming ahead and procrastination is getting the better of you?  It’s probably not the best approach to sit around and expect the Universe to place the completed work in your lap, all finished and ready to go!

Life is not a one-size-fits-all experience, and what feels right for one person may not feel right for another.  Our actions and emotions are often shaped through the lens of past experience, many of which trace as far back as childhood.  So, what lies at the heart of this matter? In my own experience, learning when to take action and when to wait has meant getting in touch with my inner emotions.  

Emotions are signals for us that there is something within calling for our attention.  In moments of rising emotion, like when I was impatiently swatting at the fly in my car, it’s important to ask ourselves: What emotion am I feeling?  What sensations am I feeling in my body?  Is there a message or memory that this feeling is trying to communicate?

As we bring our awareness within, we build a bridge between our external experiences and our internal environment.  This bridge creates a more harmonious flow of energy, allowing healing to take place and your intuition to bloom.  Like a fly buzzing around your personal space, will you brush away what is calling for your attention from within, or will you take these moments as opportunities, and with patience and perseverance, bridge that connection to your inner wisdom?

To me, it is no coincidence that it was a fly that came as a messenger to impart this wisdom.  For a fly has such a short but mighty life, and no opportunity is wasted! And where others might see trash, the fly sees treasure!  Impatience, fear, sadness, anger…what do you see when you experience these heavy emotions?  Do you view them as something to be discarded or tucked away from view, or as gems waiting to be dusted off, observed, and honored, revealing the gifts that lay waiting in the shadows?

Building emotional awareness is one of my great passions, but that wasn’t always the case!  I was raised in an environment where feelings weren’t shared or expressed, and it took me a while to even open up to acknowledging their presence, let alone sharing them with others.  If this has been your experience too, having a trusted therapist can be a powerful first step in healing those childhood wounds.  

Society often encourages us to focus on the positive and let go of the negative.  However, love, joy, fear, sadness…all emotions…hold equal value in our lives.  If you find yourself stuck in reactivity or closing off your emotions, there are gentle steps you can take to begin shifting that pattern.  

If this story and reflection resonate with you, and you feel called to explore your own emotional awareness more deeply, I invite you to watch this video that I shared on my TikTok page. In it, I walk through a simple yet powerful practice that I personally use when heavy emotions come up in my life. 

Remember, building emotional awareness takes time.  Be patient with yourself.  Trust that your Spirit Within will guide you in the right direction for your own healing and growth.  

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